20 WEEKS
Today is the twenty week mark for our sweet babe. Only twenty weeks until we meet Tatum. WHAT?! Do not even starting listing the stuff to do in your head Sierra Morgan Barnhart. I am really loving being pregnant and most days are enjoyable. There are days I would like to punch people in the face or run them off the road. I blame that on hormones and people being dumbasses. Here’s a few things that I have learned over the past twenty weeks. Sit back, enjoy and please for the love of wine, have a glass of Cabernet for me.
- People think you want to hear about how horrendous their labor was. Girl, I am a first time mom. Really don’t wanna hear how you ripped
all the way down. Appreciate the honesty but let’s chat carseats or something that doesn’t make me visualize things I have no business visualizing. - Snapchat reverse camera is a bitch.
- I actually don’t miss wine that much. I mean I do but I don’t. I miss Subway sandwiches more. and sushi. and Corona Light. and runny eggs.
getting hungry so I’m gonna stop listing. - Are you scared Tucker won’t make it back in time for the birth? OMG what he only gets 72 hours home?!!?!? These have been legit questions a time or four. Yep
in my head I am thinking you dumb f of course I am scared his ass won’t make it back in time also brb sobbing at the fact he won’t be home for a month after babe is born!!!!! - Other mamas give the best advice & lists of “must haves” for baby. Cannot thank those women enough for telling me what products worked and didn’t work for them. And answering my 123 questions.
- I find myself Googling “Epidurals”, “Natural birth”, “C section” and “Water Birth” and proceeding to watch the videos. Bad move. Dumb move. Fascinating choice on my behalf. Cringeworthy decision.
Can you blame me?! I want to see what I am working with here. T shakes his head at me every single time I tell him I’ve put myself through watching these videos. - I 100% cannot drive without stopping to use the ladies room on the drive to Cincinnati. Or the mall. Or down the street.
- Hashtag BLESSED that I did not throw up one time!!!!
- Why the hell didn’t I crave fruit like this before pregnancy?
- Wait, why haven’t I eaten fish in 20 weeks? Oh yeah, it disgusts me. I also didn’t consume red meat for 19 weeks. Who am I? A cheap date. No wine or filet. Gimme all da carbs. Or fruit. I’ve actually ordered a fruit cup as an appetizer. Followed by key lime pie for an entree.
- Googling every little twinge/pain is actually the best. I realize any scary thing is a SLIM possibility. Speaking of slim…How the f are celebrities so much hotter after kids? Y’all send me that advice. Thanks in advance.
- Can’t tell y’all how many times I’ve heard “Get ready for a miserable hot swollen summer pregnancy…man sittin’ at games will be brutal” Thanks. We actually have a wives lounge with air conditioning, TV’s and bottled water if my large and in charge ass can’t sit through the entire game.
- Talking about my boobs is an everyday thing.
- I didn’t think Tucker could be any better of a husband or friend than he is but damn pregnancy has somehow made him even better. From the “Preggatinis” book to him ordering clothes he loves for the baby to him tickling my back so I can sleep to him buying Pottery Barn crib sheets on his own to him wiping every tear of fear that I have to him reading books on how to be a great dad to everything in between. There are times I burst into tears just looking at him. I love him so much. I love how he loves this baby so much. I love how he makes me feel like I’ve never looked better
when I swear I see a new stretch mark every two weeks. Blessed that that man is my husband. - I’ve learned that carpal tunnel is a thing during pregnancy. A thing that requires me wearing two sexy wrist splints to bed. A thing that makes it hurt to text. Resulting in me crying when T goes on the road because I want to text but it hurts. Real probs.
- I can have a grilled asian zing salad from Buffalo Wild Wings and in approximately 26 minutes I will have heartburn. Actually, most food gives me heartburn. Maybe Tatum will have hair unlike me as a baby who resembled Mr. Potato Head.
- I’ve learned that there is no such thing as an “off limits” topic during pregnancy. Puttin’ it all out there.
- Never felt a love like the love I feel for this baby.
- I really wonder if Britney Spears, Jason Aldean or Future will be lullabies that soothe Tatum considering thats kinda my playlist 24/7.
- I swear Prince is getting more protective of me. He also wants his own pregnancy pillow. I kiss him 1000 times a day because I swear he has gotten cuter and snugglier over the last twenty weeks.
That wraps up the twenty things that have been the highlight of the past twenty weeks. Cheers to the next twenty. Praying we can have a great/ healthy second half and if the second half is as great as the first thennnnn my hubs better watch out because I’m really diggin’ this preggy thing (as of this moment) and would do it again x2 or 3 kinda depends on how the whole labor thing goes too, don’t worry I won’t share my TMI birthing story or videos with you đŸ˜‰ As always, feel free to send me any tips, products y’all love, stories (even if they are ratchet I’ll listen and probably be too nice) or anything y’all want to share!
Happy Easter!
Mrs. B, Mama B, Googler of all things pregnancy related